Nothing Says America Like the Beaches of Malta

I am really quicking myself in the crotch for not posting this earlier when I found out about it. Although it has made its rounds on the internet, if you have not seen this yet, you simply must before you perish (it is a big file but it is so fucking worth it).

The man making love to the camera is Dennis Madalone, a hollywood stuntman/world record holder/songwriter/ patriot/my coke dealer/true friend to America. His love for country stems from the time he was working on the set of "Demolition Man" and Stallone refused to do a stunt where he was to be cryogenically frozen. Madalone saw this as his "big break" and stood in for Stallone while the crew immersed his body in nitroglycerin where he would spend the next ten years in suspended animation. When Madalone immersed from his freeze someone told him about 9-11 and he got pissed. He decided to release a kick-ass rock ballad/ballet and video in which he swims with ghost dolphins and touches a black child's head.